The Superman Effect
by titansfan1211
Summary: When Artemis learns that Robin goes to her school, she bets him she can figure out his secret identity within a week. To find the boy wonder, she enlists the help of her pal Dick Grayson.


"So what exactly am I looking for?" Dick asked his classmate, lazily stabbing a piece of broccoli with his fork.

"A guy." Dick's eyebrow shot up, intrigued.

"Anyone special?" he teased. "Looking for the future _Mr._ Artemis Crock?"

"NO," the blonde swatted at him. "Dork. He's just a friend of mine."

"Yeah? What's his name?"

"Don't worry about it." Artemis snapped, a little too quickly.

Dick smirked, "Keeping secrets then, are we Arty? How am I supposed to find him if I don't know who I'm looking for?"

"You'll know him when you see him, trust me."

"If you say so." Dick watched as Artemis took a few bites of her sandwich, the pair sitting in a comfortable silence. After taking a few bites of his own lunch, he asked, "So if he's your friend, why do you need my help finding him? School isn't that big. You should be able to just spot him in the halls, right?"

With a sigh, Artemis leveled with him. At least, in part. "I don't totally know what he looks like, okay?"

"A mystery man?" Dick wiggled his eyebrows at her, "Intriguing. Though it still sounds like you're talking about some secret online boyfriend."

"Ugh, if you're going to be an idiot about this then never mind, I'll ask Barbara to help me," she asserted, standing up with her tray. Dick grabbed her by the elbow as she moved past him, beckoning for her to sit back down.

"No! No, that won't be necessary. I'll be helpful. I promise." Artemis stared him down for a moment, before sitting back down across from him.

"Fine."

"But I do have to ask-" he worded his question carefully, noting the stony glare she met his gaze with, "you say this guy is your friend, and that he goes to school here, and that you need to find him. But you don't know what he looks like?" Artemis nodded. "And exactly _how_ did you get yourself into this situation?"

"Well…" Artemis trailed off, thinking of just that.

 **Twenty Four Hours Prior...**

"-It's the Superman Effect. People are BLIND." Robin explained to Wally, as the pair entered the kitchen, where Artemis happened to be studying.

"The what?" Artemis asked, looking up from her textbook, welcoming the distraction.

Wally jumped in to explain."The Superman Effect. The idea is basically that Superman could be standing literally right in front of you, in plane clothes, in line at the foodstore or the bank or something, and you wouldn't recognize him. At all."

Artemis snorted "I think I'd know if Superman of all people was standing in front of me. He doesn't even wear a mask."

"And yet, nobody in Metropolis is any the wiser to his secret identity," Robin pointed out.

"Yeah. And besides-" Wally added on, talking between bites, "we all know for sure that you'd be the last to figure it out, even if he were standing in front of you with the shield across his tee shirt."

"Oh yeah?" Artemis challenged, taking insult, "and why's that?"

"I mean, you've literally been going to school with another member of this team for two years without noticing, so there's that."

Artemis's jaw dropped, looking from Wally to Robin in confusion. "What, is this some sort of prank? There's no way that-"

"I go to Gotham Academy?" Robin filled in, looking rather smug. "Yeah. I see you in the halls all the time."

"Bullshit."

"We've had classes together. Full conversations." He held his head in mock agony. "I'm hurt that you don't remember me."

"No. No way." Artemis slammed her textbook shut, gathering up her notebooks. "Whatever half brained scheme you two have going, I'm not buying into it. I would totally have noticed by now if we went to the same-"

"Rumor has it that Miss Dillard has a thing with one of the gym teachers." Robin shot out, causing Artemis to stand there gaping like a fish. "Or at least, that's what everyone's been saying this week. Personally, my bets are on Mr. Thompson, if any, but she seems to have more chemistry with a certain Vice Principal Jannet."

"How do you know all that?" Artemis demanded.

"Duh. Because he goes to school with you," Wally chimed in, "I don't know why this is so hard for you to wrap your head around. Like we said. Superman Effect. Honestly it would have been shocking if you _had_ figured out Rob was there already, without knowing to look for him."

"Well, assuming that Robin does really go to my school, and that the two of you aren't just being idiots, I'm sure I can find him easily."

"Two weeks?" Robin proposed, holding out his hand.

"I'll find you in one."

"Done." They shook on it, Robin's eyes gleaming with mischief. "Just let me know if you need any hints."

"As if."

 **Present**

"Hello? Earth to Artemis?" Artemis snapped back to reality, slapping Dick's waving hand out of her face.

"Sorry, I spaced for a second. What were you asking?"

"How you ended up with a friend that you can't identify on sight?" Dick reminded, teasing.

"He's- uhh he's…" She really should've thought of a cover story ahead of time. "A pen pal!" she insisted, a bit too enthusiastically. "Yeah. He is my pen pal. And he goes here, apparently. But I just found out." She continued more truthfully, "He knows who I am. But instead of just coming up to me like a human being, he's decided to turn this reveal into some sort of obnoxious game."

"Sounds like fun. For him, at least." Artemis rolled her eyes. "Did he at least give you any clues?" Dick continued, pulling out a notepad and a pencil.

"Apparently we've had class together at some point in the past two years, so there's that."

"Well that narrows it down some," Dick agreed, studiously scribbling down onto the notepad. "You happen to remember every guy you've had class with?"

"Not offhand," she admitted, pulling a paper from her bag, "but I've compiled a list from all my old class lists. Grabbing the paper from her hand, Dick scanned the list.

"Have you narrowed it down since this? There are still several potential pen pals on your list."

"I mean a little." Pulling the paper towards her, she began scribbling out a handful of names. "These guys have all graduated, so it can't be any of them." Dick watched her work, giving a nod of encouragement.

"Ok, what else?"

"Well he's younger than me. So he couldn't have been in one of those classes with me."

"Right. The school is strict about those. Math, science and english are all based on placement tests, though, so he could've been in one of those." Artemis nodded in agreement. "A good thing, too-" Dick continued cheekily pulling the list back towards him, "otherwise you wouldn't have had the pleasure of meeting me."

"And what a travesty that would've been," Artemis retorted with a snort. She reached out to grab the list, but Dick got to it first.

"Hold up, I'm making a short list - yours is getting kind of scribbly and messy. It's driving me nuts. Also - I'm offended. You forgot to add me to your list." He shook his head in mock disappointment. "And after all the times we've shared."

Artemis rolled her eyes at him, reaching for his notebook. "I didn't forget you, you dork. I omitted you from the list. Intentionally. You're not him. Obviously." Dick held the notebook just out of reach.

As he finished writing everything down, he asked, "what, I can't be your mystery pen pal? Am I not mysterious enough for you?"

"You're nothing alike, for starters." She reached across the table for the notebook again, but Dick held it farther back, just out of reach.

"We've almost solved this thing, I want it to be a surprise." Begrudgingly, Artemis obliged. "Now, did he give you any other hints? Besides being in a class with him?"

"It wasn't _a_ class," Artemis amended, "he said _classes._ Plural. Who's left that I've had multiple classes with?"

Dramatically, Dick pulled back out Artemis' list. "Better cross reference. I eliminated doubles on my list." Artemis impatiently waited as Dick checked back and forth between the two lists, painfully slowly.

On what felt like his 18th time double checking, Artemis blurted out, "Well?"

"Well," Dick smiled, a gleam of something sinister in his eyes. "It seems like there's only one match remaining." Artemis' face lit up. Finally, she had uncovered the identity of the boy wonder! And it hadn't even taken her the full week! Dick dramatically stood up, notebook in hand. "Well, are you ready to meet your super suave, mysterious, asterous pen pal?"

"Just give me the notebook, Grayson" she quickly responded, holding her hand out expectantly.

"Flip the page, and the answers you seek shall be revealed." Shit eating grin on his face, trying his best to hold back a laugh, Dick handed over the notebook. Artemis took a deep breath before flipping the page.

She looked down, surprised to find not a series of scribbled out notes as she had expected, but a note:

 **It's me stupid. Try to stay whelmed. - R**

The puzzle pieces had only half clicked in her brain when she heard Dick say with a shrug, "I told you - it's the Superman Effect. People are blind."

"Why you-!" She looked up to find an empty spot across from her at the table, a faint, but distinctly Robin-like cackle off in the distance somewhere. She looked back down at the note, absolutely aghast, shaking her head.

"Brat."


End file.
